(Day 5) Thankful For. . . .

Grandma Teddy!

My dear husband’s grandmother passed away October 2003. We all still miss her dearly. There are times that I get sad when I think that my children will never know how spunky and determined she was. How she would drop everything, including going to church for a chance at a good fishing hole; about the cookie jar that was always there even if the cookies weren’t always edible, how delicious her baked beans and chocolate cakes were and how she would literally give the shoes off her feet if she thought they would benefit anyone whether it be family, friend, or stranger. Her name was Winifred but don’t you dare call her that! I remember being in the hospital visiting her once when a new nurse came on shift that walked in and called her Winifred, weak as she was her voice was strong and snappy with her comeback, “Just you call me Teddy son and we’ll get along fine!”

As happens when loved ones pass away there was the inevitable dividing up of her belongings. Along with some of the items which held treasured memories for my husband there were some practical items that we brought home with us, some mixing bowls, beautiful blue crystal glasses, a few baking accessories, a cane chair (that I sit in each day as I check my email), some embroidered hankies and table runners and a few other items. Without fail each and every time my husband is home and either one of us use one of his grandmother’s possessions he makes a comment to the effect of “Thanks you grandma for sharing your love with us. You were a wonderful grandma and I miss you!” Then he will take one of our boys in his arms and tell them a story about his time with his grandmother. He has many of them as he grew up next door to her. As each story winds on to its conclusion he inevitable ends with a short lesson on the gospel and how we will one day be together again with Grandma Teddy and then the boys will see for themselves what a wonderful Grandma she is.

I love how he expresses gratitude for the role his grandmother played in his life and how he uses her possessions to teach our boys to be grateful and to love the great-grandmother that they will only remember from pictures and his stories, as well as the plan of salvation. He could focus on his grief and how much he misses her, and how painful it is to go visit his parents and see her empty home for sale but he doesn’t. He has found that “We can lift ourselves, and others as well, when we refuse to remain in the realm of negative thought and cultivate within our hearts an attitude of gratitude. If ingratitude be numbered among the serious sins, then gratitude takes its place among the noblest of virtues.” Thomas S. Monson, “An Attitude of Gratitude,” Ensign, Feb. 2000, 2

I truly hope and pray that as the years go on he and I will continue to follow the admonition of the apostle Paul and “Cease not to give thanks for you, making mention of you in my prayers” (EPHESIANS 1:16) as we teach our children about this wonderful grandmother and the ways her life experiences impacted each of us and who we are today and hopefully help them learn a little about gratitude along the way.

Note: The previous was written in December of 2004. Since that time many of Grandma Teddy's possessions have become a part of our everyday family life. The table that once graced her kitchen is where we gather for meals, snacks, homework, and art projects. In our bedroom you will find the same headboard, foot-board, and dressers that were in hers. I often use the linens on the piano, our dressers, nightstands, or elsewhere throughout our home. Although only our oldest son was ever held in her arms I'm certain that one day she will take all of the boys into her embrace and I hope at that time that through our stories they will know her and feel her love for them.