No Hope. . .

Another blogger whom I follow had the title "No Hope"  of course Hope is her dog and she was talking about something else entirely.  But I read it and thought that's how I feel right now.  I feel like there is no hope.  No hope of me not bursting into tears every time someone asks me how I'm doing, no hope of the boys being okay again, no hope of anyone understanding how much I hurt and how deep my grief goes.

I often wonder lately why I even try to keep going forward because there really doesn't seem like any hope of ever getting better.  No hope of being able to pull our family out of this trial stronger on the other side knowing that we will be okay.

I'm just so tired and sadly I really just want to give up...tried the test...did my best...and I'd rather not pass on to the next grade.

I wonder how one might "clep" out of all the rest?