Well not really. I do however have a list of things to pack and a shopping list for things I need that I don't have on hand. I've got the preparations for the dinner group tomorrow night underway. The Comedian approves of my wardrobe choices. He told me this morning "No Mom, you should wear some of the cute clothes" I was given some darling clothes by a friend, V (who got them through someone else) and I was doing a mini-fashion show last night. So I changed into one of the tops before I picked him up from school today. Who knew that my 6 year old cares about how I dress. He was oddly enough appreciative and told me with a great smile that is going to make some very special person's heart flutter when he's older that he was so happy that I was wearing the cute clothes and that I was the best mommy he ever knew. (did you notice that run on sentence? Well I hope it makes sense somehow to you because I'm not going to edit it. Instead I'll just write this really long commentary about it and surely that will take less time and energy than going back and sorting it out. So there :P ) Guess maybe I need to reevaluate my own clothing sense and see if I need to step up the cuteness factor a bit, especially is it is going to be noticed.
Since I'm being truthful and all I've got to tell you I'm full of nerves but really can't wait to meet all the ladies at the retreat this weekend. My batteries are so low and I'm really counting on them being recharged so that I can come back at all this jumbled combination of appointments, stress, grief, and facing the long road of recovery ahead with some new energy and fresh perspective.
I am grateful to my friends who are helping to juggle the boys and my husband for making this much needed break to happen. Another friend who is helping through all this mess asked me if I was feeling guilty about leaving them and while this may change, truly right now I don't. I know that they will be in good hands. K and C will love and care for them like they are their own children on Friday and I think it will be nice for them to have some one on one time with their papa for the rest of the weekend.
Although, you know that feeling of just waiting for something to fall to pieces around you because you are planning something just for yourself? That's me right now. . . .
But there is not much right now that could keep me from going and anything that would is highly unlikely so watch out world because mama needs a break!
Anyone want to volunteer to hold my hand and calm my nerves between now and Friday? Huh? Please?
5 comments:
I am SO EXCITED for you!!
Ditto what Corey said...
HAVE A GREAT TIME! Seriously!
I read all your posts whenever they come on, but still I feel like I've missed something. I'm excited for you for this retreat. I hope you relax and really enjoy yourself. When I would leave my boys when they were little, the hardest was the actual leaving...then once all the goodbyes were over and I was on the road, all was well. I hope you feel this way too. And don't let guilt come into the picture. If it does, just tell yourself that you will soon be back to doing all the work at home...so enjoy this little pause while you have it. :)
I am so jealous but so very glad that you are getting time yourself you deserve it. It has been a tough year for you. What great friends and husband you have. Enjoy your weekend. Where are you going?
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